Upon setting foot on U.S. soil, I immediately sensed the pervasive influence of culture in every situation I encountered. Despite having spent eight years studying English at both high school and university levels, my preparation was insufficient for navigating a new culture, in reality. While my language skills, I believe, were adequate, the intricacies of American culture were far more nuanced and complex than I had anticipated.
Much of my understanding of America had been gleaned from Hollywood movies and occasional news snippets, which often presented a simplified or exaggerated version of reality. As I immersed myself in daily life, I realized that there were many aspects of American culture that I had not encountered before, from social norms and customs to the subtleties of interpersonal communication.
Experiencing a whole new culture is essential for appreciating one’s own, as it broadens one’s perspective, fosters empathy, and encourages personal growth by exposing one to different ways of thinking, living, and interacting with others. Interestingly, it is often said that individuals moving to a new country undergo four stages of culture shock: “honeymoon,” “frustration,” “adaptation,” and “acceptance.”
Culture shock, an inevitable process, was something I was forced to undergo. During my first weeks in the U.S., I was enthusiastic about exploring new things, meeting different people, and visiting various places. This essentially constitutes the honeymoon period of culture shock. However, as time passed and the initial excitement waned, I began to experience homesickness and frustration with many cultural behaviors observed in the States, marking the transition to the second phase of culture shock (frustration).
Furthermore, having spent almost eight months in the States, I believe I have entered the adjustment phase of culture shock and I am transitioning towards the acceptance phase. I am beginning to grasp the cultural intricacies more deeply and sense a greater integration into my new environment. In this article, I aim to shed light on some cultural differences based on my subjective observations–acknowledging the limitations of my experiences–as I haven’t had the opportunity to explore every region of the U.S., nor encounter every individual.
Transitioning from a family-based culture to an individualistic one proved challenging. Coming from a polychronic culture, where time is viewed as flexible and relationships hold more significance than strict schedules, adapting to the American emphasis on punctuality and individual time management was a bit challenging. In Morocco, we find enjoyment in leisurely activities such as preparing and savoring meals, like the time-consuming process of making and enjoying a tagine, which could take nearly two hours. However, in the U.S., there is a focus on efficiency and prioritizing time management. This shift in focus from communal to individual priorities not only impacted my daily routines, but also influenced how I formed connections and interacted with others.
Additionally, the concept of personal space and boundaries in interpersonal relationships was notably different, requiring me to adjust my communication style and approach to social interactions. Americans tend to be more self-focused and introspective, and often inhabit their own world. Nevertheless, despite these individualistic tendencies, the United States offers a distinctive chance to delve into a myriad of cultures. Unlike numerous other nations, diversity is embraced and readily accessible through the celebration of diverse events and communities. To truly embrace this aspect of American life, I actively sought out opportunities to engage with non-native U.S. cultures by attending cultural events and immersing myself in diverse experiences.
At times, I sensed that the American cultural understanding of personal trust varies from that of Morocco. For instance, I vividly remember how my father would frequently invite strangers to share a meal with us, and how I’d return from school to find my mother having tea with a woman she’d met at a shopping center. This exemplifies how Moroccans often extend trust to strangers from the outset, whereas Americans generally prefer to establish trust gradually over time. Personally, I have indeed noticed that Americans tend to be wary of granting trust to strangers from the first encounter. Various factors can influence this tendency, such as cultural norms, societal dynamics, and personal experiences.
One contributing factor is the cultural emphasis on individualism in American society. Individualism often promotes self-reliance and independence, which makes individuals prioritize their own interests and well-being over those of strangers. This mindset may translate into a reluctance to trust unfamiliar individuals until they have demonstrated their trustworthiness through actions or shared experiences. Contrary to my earlier assertion, personal anecdotes, such as my encounter with Jim–an author I met at a café who graciously invited me into his home despite knowing very little about me–challenge the point I made earlier.
On numerous occasions, I’ve observed that Americans frequently refrain from expressing their opinions when talking to people they don’t know well. During a conversation with two individuals, Person A and Person B, I expressed my thoughts, with which Person A disagreed. However, after Person A left, Person B privately disclosed to me that they actually shared my viewpoint. When questioned about their silence earlier, Person B explained they wished to avoid causing any discomfort. This illustrates how Americans occasionally choose silence to avoid conflicts or prevent hurt feelings. While prioritizing social harmony is crucial, I believe that limiting discussions to close circles or like-minded individuals might deprive us of diverse perspectives essential for broadening our understanding of the world.
The tipping culture in the U.S. was another aspect of American life that initially struck me as unusual. While tipping in restaurants might be common in many places globally, the expectation of tipping baristas in cafes, even for minimal service, initially felt strange and perplexing to me. Additionally, I was surprised to learn about the practice of tipping other service providers, such as hairdressers and taxi drivers, which was not common in my home country. However, over time, I have come to understand tipping as a gesture of appreciation for good service and have adapted to this practice. It serves as a way to acknowledge the efforts of those providing services and is ingrained in American social norms. I’ve grown accustomed to it and find myself tipping more frequently, especially for those who are genuinely nice to me and provide excellent service.
I also attended some events on campus and talked with people about what I study at my university. The next day, I saw some of the aforementioned individuals again, but they acted like we hadn’t met before. At first, I was confused and couldn’t understand why they were acting that way. When I asked some Americans, they said there are a few reasons why someone might act like they don’t remember meeting you, such as simply being busy or forgetting one’s name and feeling embarrassed about it. I found it difficult to understand, because, in Morocco, even brief conversations at events or running into someone on the bus usually lead to acknowledging them later. But in the U.S., people might forget these interactions due to preoccupation with other issues or difficulty remembering faces.
One final reflection is that, throughout my time in the U.S., despite being from a different country, I’ve never felt like a foreigner. Whenever I meet Americans, they don’t initially assume I’m not American until I mention it. Here, anyone can be considered American, and people treat you accordingly. I find this inclusivity and assumption of belonging truly remarkable.
Overall, my journey in the U.S. has been a lesson in cultural adaptation and understanding, challenging preconceived notions while enriching my appreciation for diverse perspectives. None of this would have been possible if it weren’t for having received a Fulbright Grant to study and teach there.
* Aziz Ghannaj is an English teacher, an OPEN E-teacher program alumnus and a Fulbright FLTA grantee.