Narcissism: Effective Ways to Handle a Narcissistic Person
Many times, we tend to end the relationship with narcissistic people as it seems the best solution. What if those people fall in the circle of our family members or close people?
It is very important to know that there is a difference between narcissistic personality disorder and narcissism, in general, not every narcissistic person necessarily has a narcissistic personality disorder, because, on the one hand, narcissism is a personality trait many individuals live, yet becomes evident occasionally, while on the other hand, a narcissistic personality disorder is a formal mental health condition with persistent symptoms that significantly impact the quality of life.
Narcissistic personality disorder, whose scientific name is NPD is a mental illness that requires professional help, and the truth is, specialists could not fully understand the cause of this type of disorder, however, they attributed it to many factors, the most important of which are genes, upbringing, education, suffering in childhood, or several traumas at certain age stages.
People diagnosed with this type of disorder often have high levels of self-confidence that might reach vanity. They like to be the center of attention and always under the spotlight, they tend to focus on bullying heavily or ridiculing others, they dominate and control conversations, they know exactly how to benefit from everyone around them and employ them to serve their needs, they are not receptive to criticism at all, they tend to have high charisma and ability to manipulate people at first, however, this does not last long until they reveal their true identity.
Self-confidence turns out vanity, social intelligence turns out exploitation, and love for attention and validation is actually selfishness.
Dealing with such a personality consumes very high energy from you and burdens your soul, therefore, you need to understand the ABCs to decode this personality, to maintain your psychological and mental peace.
In this article, you will be introduced to the most important methods that a narcissistic person uses, as well as how to deal with them properly.
Before you proceed reading, you should be aware that if you already know by now that you are dealing with a narcissistic personality, then you are already on the right path. Moreover, keep in mind that you should not take any of his actions or words personally so as to prevent affecting your self-confidence and safety.
The most popular method a narcissistic personality uses and many people fall victim to is mental manipulation, or in other words, gaslighting. Gaslighting is one of the favorite methods used by a narcissistic personality, and it simply means that the narcissistic person uses psychological methods of manipulation to question the ability of the second person, as well as his sanity.
The best example that could be given is when they come to denying a certain situation or speech they said or making you doubt your memory. At first, chances are you will be able to detect such behaviors easily, but as time passes by, you will find yourself alarmed by certain details. In order to deal with this situation, you will have to use it as defense evidence, along with citing similar situations.
Never let such behavior make you doubt yourself, on the opposite, remember that you understand this then calm down and discuss it with him, for instance: “Excuse me, I suggest double check yourself and your memory again because I’m pretty sure of what happened” then end the debate. Calm, self-control, and effective communication, this is how you win the round without allowing the narcissist to get stubborn and sticks with you.
The second most famous method is amplifying your reactions and minimizing your action itself because if you do so, the narcissistic person will tend to amplify his reaction as well. Once they annoy you, they might tend to say something like: “this is not supposed to bother you, I was only joking with you” (even though they were not joking).
The best way to deal with this situation requires two connected points, firstly, you should be aware of what he is doing, and secondly, you should start setting boundaries with this person, and this is one of the most successful techniques to deal with the narcissistic personality, simply, set your boundaries with them, in the calmest way. You can state it in something like: “I am fully aware of what you are doing and the way you’re behaving, if this behavior persists, I will not continue this discussion with you.”
The silent treatment is one of the methods narcissistic people use to punish their partners. A narcissistic person uses the intended silence treatment, as well as ignoring, to anger them. Therefore, your reaction here should be expressed in different stages.
At first, you have to make it clear to the narcissistic person that you do not accept this method that opposes communication, that it bothers you, and that it will not solve the problem on the table. If the behavior persists and you start seeing a pattern, try to remain calm, your calm is going to play a winning card, and it is itself a response to him, he will understand by then that his method has failed. The last stage is to mirror his behavior, the more a narcissistic person tends to use the silent treatment, the more he dislikes being treated with it.
At the end of the day, dealing with narcissistic personalities is hectic and difficult, however, by following the right methods, you can understand this personality, its fears, and its motives, enabling you to deal with it in a way that maintains your psychological and mental well-being.
Bear in mind, ending the relationship with such people is a suitable solution, however, sometimes these people fall within the circle of our close people, like family and friends, people who are important to us, and it is hard to end our relationship with them.
You know, narcissistic personalities are like a coin with two sides. Just like they have bad traits, on the other side, they are charming and attractive naturally. People living with narcissistic persons often gain high self-confidence. Narcissistic people are very strong and difficult to resist, they help you in difficult situations as a result of their strong and successful personalities and they’re someone to count on them.